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About Me Member Comedy Writer B-E-T-H30/Female/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 5 Years
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Statistics 42 Deviations
727 Comments
9,541 Pageviews

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Dallas
  • Interests: Lobbying, comedy, hating, music, art, pandering, cooperating, centaurs, strokes, and prams
  • Favourite movie: Anything that produces a shit load of blood, comedies, and other movies that I can make fun of.
  • Favourite band or musician: Tom Waits/Radiohead/Pavement/The Residents/Broken Social Scene/etc.
  • Favourite genre of music: The kind that isn't Lady Gaga
  • Favourite artist: Everyone
  • Favourite poet or writer: I don't like poetry. Please don't read me your bad poems.
  • Favourite photographer: That guy always outside my window.
  • Favourite style of art: The kind that is not Jasper Johns
  • Operating System: My lungs, brain, and a few machines
  • MP3 player of choice: The kind that plays records.
  • Shell of choice: Turtle...like Koopa
  • Wallpaper of choice: I LOVE wallpaper with pretty floral borders to off-set my velvet paintings. Who the fuck cares?
  • Skin of choice: Crispy, or KFC Original
  • Favourite game: Trivial Pursuit/Halo/Tetris/Chess/Scrabble
  • Favourite cartoon character: Mr. Natural/Drinky Crow/Naked cartoons. They\'re HOT.
  • Personal Quote: God dammit!
  • Tools of the Trade: Piano Rebuilding/Screw Drivers/Table Saws/Ebony Pencil/Time Coder

WHO AM I?

Mon Oct 5, 2009, 11:25 AM
Well, it didn't take another year to update this. Just 10 months!

I'm getting married in two weeks. TO A MAN.

I work for Funimation now, working on Anime shows. Yes, I said ANIME. That thing I hate. I work from home, get paid shit loads of cash, and get to hear super sweet lady-grunts from 13-year-old cartoon girls who get attacked by kitten robots. Jealous?

I have learned something about Anime these past 6 months of working. When a girl says, "NO! Stop!" Or my personal favorite, "No...not there! NOT THERE!" What she is really saying (and this is only in Japan so don't try this at home unless your name is Ginku-san) is that she wants you to show her your tentacles and possibly rape her with them. Then she'll say, "It's so good," and you've both learned a valuable lesson.

1. You don't have to listen to anyone when they say no. Just keep doing what you want and eventually they'll come around.

2. She learned to try something new, and just as you suspected, she LIKES IT!!!! It's like tasting escargot the first time. You're dubious, a bit skeptical about eating snails, and think you might puke. But someone forces it in your mouth despite your protests and you're now a bigger person for having survived it. Also, snails are classy, so quit complaining and crying all the time you baby!

*note sarcasm if you have no humor and are lame and suck*

What else...oh! I'm working on a graphic novel right now and hope to start posting art boards here in the near future. Start holding your breath right now. A: it makes me feel good about myself and B: I just want to see if you'll do it.

That's all for now. Thank you for reading.

  • Listening to: Here Comes the War - I'm In You

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Comments


:iconmorrison55:
COME BACK DAMN YOU OR I MAY SELF COMBUST!!!!!!!!!

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aoccdrnig to rscheearch at cmabrigde uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny ipmortnat tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it
:iconb-e-t-h:
I DID COME BACK, DON'T DIE!

(I'm getting married in 2 weeks, wtf?!?!)
:iconmorrison55:
Christ! Congratulations! You'll make the most awesome housewife:))

I am living with a Swedish viking and practicing being a housewife and thinking about giving up painting... but then I realised I don't like washing up, making the bed, cooking 3 times a day, and vacuuming - and painting is much cheaper than therapy, so the viking can be my housewife and I'll continue to wear the trousers. But I keep dreaming of freaking babies and buns in the oven - whatever could that mean...

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aoccdrnig to rscheearch at cmabrigde uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny ipmortnat tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and you can sitll raed it
:iconcranberian:
Oh, Awesometown. Where the fuck art thou?

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"Boy, you got a panty on your head."
:iconj2n4me:
I DON'T KNOW

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   JAMES
    BOT
:iconphathryyn:
where the fuck are you

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I feel happy, perky. Like a 14 year old cheerleader filled on quarterback's cock.
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